Something inspired me to get back my "human sense" and such feeling...the bravery to continue where i stuck on...don't know since when i have stepped inside such big deep hole...it became fact and isn't it faith???could i change it somehow i don't know the way to lead myself somewhere else i wish to... just want to grab the opportunity and fulfill my desires in my mind...really that tough??? seems nobody could answer...do hope that someone could listen and accept my suggestion at the right time...please DO NOT convince me with those ridiculous reasons...it was not true at all...i could handle it as well...why don't you think about what circumstances i am facing and consequences at last...i just don't want to make things worse or even worst...please again...think about it with standing by my side...
Wondering that this stuff offered me how many sleepless nights...wrestled and strove against it...while tried to have my fitful sleep...yet i failed...i must convince you but not another way round...every time when i was thinking about this...that is the word -->down ...i will prove it to you all...please believe in me...
I did make myself get high last week...it was pretty cool...the feeling was freaking great...spent the whole night giggling, but never got totally drunk...that was the only night i could sleep tight without any deep thinking...i admitted i did deny when was being questioned...i am okay...may be someone could see it through...yet i denied...but i was really fine...such a silly...confused...
''how could this happen to me''
-may be i made my mistakes and nowhere to run
-nights goes on as i am fading away, just wanna scream
-hope when i open my eyes, i cant remember how, i cant remember why, i am lying here
-with everyone's screaming, i try to make a sound but no one hears me
-could i say 'i am sick of this life'
Even though i could get what i want at this moment...but i believe it would not last longer as it goes further...may be i cant cope with it...and don't even try on my endurance...will burst it out soon...don't piss me off often (particular person)...so i chose to walk slower and leave behind...
Have to thank someone who cheers around...even though one day instead...yet you covered it well too...so as we are classified in the same type of creature...hopefully could solve it as soon as possible...i did agree ''don't think too much''...but sometimes just couldn't take it as easy as you think...have to consider the situations we are facing...anyway...just try to solve it if you can...yet i have to get the right time...never known when is it...still an unknown there...
well...life goes on...^^
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